Food worries

I am a bit concerned that I might not be eating enough since I've increased my activity, hence my somewhat stalled weight loss. Many of you know that I refuse to track calories, points, etc. I find that in doing that, I become obsessed... like I need to enter that tootsie roll into Sparkpeople RIGHTNOW. But, in calculating my basal metabolic rate (which tells me what calories I need to ingest before I can exist), I'm thinking that SP and other calorie counting websites are way off. I used this calculator to figure out my calorie range... and it's telling me that I need to be eating between 1450-1850 calories for weight loss. Wow. I think, just through guesstimation, that's a lot more than what I've been eating. So, I'm going to up my calories for the next two weeks and see what happens. Therefore, I will NOT be weighing in this Friday, in order to give this new approach at least 10 days to see what happens. It's just so frustrating, because it's such a delicate balance between eating too much and not eating enough. I know that once in a while, I do need to go back to tracking in order to get back on track (ugh) with my eating, but still. I hate doing it.

Confessions

I ate way too much chocolate this weekend. I had a whole bag of Snickers fun size bars, half on Friday and the rest for breakfast on Saturday (ha!). Okay, and E had two of them, I think. But still. Then yesterday, I had a bunch of Dove milk chocolate almond squares. Mmmm... I don't know why, but when I get stressed, I want chocolate. You know how people reach for comfort foods. Chocolate is my comfort food. I could honestly eat chocolate morning noon and night. I can never be sick of it. I think this is my official coming out. Hi, my name is Kiki, and I am a chocoholic. The first step is recognizing that I have a problem. The rest is learning how to deal with my "chocolate dependency."

A Giggle for Your Weekend...Courtesy of Me

I've never tried spinning. To me, it's intimidating. I keep picturing myself as Bridget Jones, Chaka Khan rightly playing in the background, falling off her exercise bike (don't know what I'm talking about? watch this video... the first 55 seconds will do). But my gym recently changed its policy regarding spinning, in that the classes don't cost any extra. So I thought, why not? I can totally hit this Sunday 12:45 class and it will be no problem. I even showed up five minutes early, introduced myself to the teacher, and had her fit me for the bike.

"Oh my" doesn't begin to cover it. My butt hurts. Literally. I was sitting on my sofa, reading some articles for the grad seminar I teach on Monday nights, and I was thinking, "that's weird, why does my butt hurt." Hmm... isn't that the same place where the bike's seat hit my butt? Ugh. The realization of this connection makes me worry about what's in store for tomorrow, at least, in the soreness department.

But the class itself was good. The instructor was good at explaining the instructions she shouted out (hover, uphill sprint, etc). And yell she did (funny, she warned me about the yelling too). At first I was a little taken back. This chick is psycho! And then I started to think about Jillian (seriously folks, is there a workout when I don't think of Ms. Michaels??) and how she yells at her trainees. It is motivating for someone to be shouting at you, because trust me, about 20 minutes in, I wanted to quit. I actually thought about getting off the bike, picking up my water bottle, and walking out. But I didn't. I stayed. I saw the sweat literally dripping off of me. My legs felt like lead at some points, and yes, I thought I was going to die. But I didn't. I stuck with it. And, while I am sore in places that I'd rather not mention, it was an awesome workout. I think I'm hooked. I think I can handle some Sunday afternoon and occasionally some Tuesday night spinning. Plus, it'll get me off the elliptical more often, which I am getting so bored with.

So... go try something new workout-wise. Hopefully, you won't be as sore as me :)

Keeping Track

I'm amazed at people who use Excel to keep track of their daily lives. Sure, I use it at work for grades and my data, but I only have one other use for it at home: I use it to track my weight. I have a spreadsheet going back to January with all my info-- weight, lost that week, lost so far, and my BMI. However, when it comes to keeping track of my exercise routine, I use a good old fashioned calendar and a pen. This hangs on my refrigerator:

I started using it as a way to keep track of what I was supposed to be doing on the Biggest Loser video. Then, when I did some of Swizzlepop's ab challenges, I used it to tally my cardio time. Now, I use it as a motivator. Did I already take a day or two off that week? Well, I'd better do something to move my booty! Here's what it looks like up close (this is October):

Today, the first day of November will have a little note that says "C25K: 38 minutes, 2.81 miles". Or maybe I can mark it as my graduation day from C25K and just say "Ran 38 minutes, 2.81 miles." Because, to me, it is UNBELIEVABLE that I actually ran for 38 minutes straight. Part of it is a mind game, and part of it is what I'm feeling in my legs and arms right now (soreness). I just can't believe I did that. I can't believe I *can* do that. I think with a month out from my 5K, training is now into full force, and I'll be aiming for those 3.1 miles every run. Woo!!!

Weekly Weigh In: The Scary Halloween Edition

I think I might be a Sopranos character for Halloween this year, only because I flipped off my scale this morning and was tempted to threaten it until it showed me the numbers I wanted to see. C'mon!!! I lost 0.8 pounds this week (yay, loss, she says sarcastically) but I'm 0.6 pounds away from my 50 pound mark. That's it. A lousy bit more than a half pound. I worked my butt off this week, and I'm so mad at what happened weight-wise. Grr. (okay, vent over. I am happy that I lost this week, but seriously, I thought I'd be in the 170s this morning, but I'm *STILL* in the 180s. Gimme a break!)

As I mentioned on Miz's blog, I was thoroughly disappointed in the whole BL Oprah edition. Basically, they paraded everyone from the last Ali-won season. It was like a WOW look at their transformation. It was a bit depressing, because everyone said they spend two hours at the gym daily to maintain what they lost on the ranch. Huh? That is not going to work in this little girl's life. One hour a day is what I can give up (okay, that's a lie, I probably could give more, but that would be bordering on exercise obsessiveness!) And it sounds like the guys had the biggest struggles with who they were in this new body.

This is something I've talked with a lot of you about... how you see yourself. I'm getting a lot better with recognizing myself in THIS body, my 180ish pound body vs. my 235ish pound body. One of the things I did this year was go through my closet and get rid of my once too tight size 20pluses. But there are still some things I held onto because they didn't look that bad. Uh, that's a lie. Too big clothes look as ridiculous as too tight clothes. But yet... and many of you know about this... there are days when I lay out my clothes in the morning, and I think, uh, no, I'm so not going to fit in that today. But then I do. Amazing. It's a mind-game, just like running is.

Another thing Jillian and Bob talked about was working out. Bob says you should have one rest day, Jillian says two. Hmm. What do YOU do? I try to exercise at least 5-6 times a week. But let me tell you... if I *only* exercise five times in one week, I do feel guilty. Why couldn't I have gone to the gym for day 6? Or did a video? Or gone for a walk? How many days a week do YOU exercise? Do you try to hit a certain goal? Do you feel guilty if you don't?

Have a good weekend!!

Just. Keep. Going.

OMG OMG OMG.... Bob and Jillian are going to be on Oprah. TODAY. THURSDAY. I just found out and rearranged my schedule so I can be home to watch (good thing I have no office hours/classes on Thursdays!!) Obviously, more on this tomorrow!!

There is this point on the "30 Day Shred" video that Jillian says "I know you think you're going to DIE... but you're not." That's where I was today. Today was my first 27 minute run, and I really thought about not doing it at all (stupid cold winter-like weather and stupid me for picking a 5K at the beginning of December). On Monday morning, when I did my last 25 minute run, I expanded my running area past the stadium/hospital complex and onto the roads/sidewalks around there. I decided to go in the opposite direction of where I went on Monday, just to challenge myself a bit. This is how the run went:

The first 17 minutes was fine. In fact, easy. (wow... did I just say that?) Nice, flat/downhill area. Then, around 17.5 minutes, I got hot. As in sweaty hot. I was running with a long-sleeved wicking shirt under a sweatshirt plus gloves... it's cold out there!!! So I stopped and took my sweatshirt off and tied it around my waist. Then, I faced the mountain. Ha. Seriously, I knew it was coming at the end of my run. So, I started running up it. I kept thinking as cars drove past me, that their drivers were thinking "OMG... she's going to die." In my head, I started thinking "OMG... I'm going to die." And then Jillian's voice popped in my head: "NO YOU ARE NOT." So, I started thinking more positively. Slow and steady wins the race. You're almost at the top. Just. Keep. Going.

And I did. And after 27 minutes, I saw that I had run 2.14 miles. That's a 12.5 minute mile!!!!!! I seriously was so proud of myself. Heck, I still am!!! I'm feeling a lot more confident about the 5K in 5 weeks. I kept having dreams about finishing the 5K in 45 minutes-- the last person across the finish line-- but if I continue at this pace, I'll be done in about 35 minutes, which is totally acceptable. I think that I can easily start running for 30 minutes at a time (which I'm going to try on Saturday and see how that works out). Trust me, I'm all smiles today :)

BL Recap: All Right Already!!!

Really really quick before I grade...

I missed the first half hour. I gathered about the Blue Team winning a temptation/challenge (what on earth would you call that?) and adding 40 pounds to the Black Team's weight at the actual hanging on a pulley challenge. (I also missed Bob calling Vicki "Shakespearean"... she's SO Lady MacBeth... damn.) Anyway, I think Phil is a big wimp. Dude, I was waiting for you to tighten your grip on that rope. Geez... to be shown up by Renee???? Should have put her in the middle.

Missed the last chance workout half hour... on the phone with my mom. But the weigh ins??? I hate Brady (but you already know that) AND Vicki AND Heba. I'm glad Phil went home (big wuss, and really? A vote for Michelle??) BUT I can't wait for next week. I love when they let old cast members rejoin (yay!! like Ali last year!!!) and that they're all going individual. Think that Vicki and Brady will end up hurting each other when they turn individual?

That's all for now. Need to grade before I head to the gym. I have another hot date tonight with the elliptical :) Tell me what YOU thought of BL!!