tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-77436366327656662032024-03-14T00:53:50.874-04:00Taking ChancesHelp me remain accountable as I work towards my goal of a healthy body weight!!!kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.comBlogger305125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-89588314361039492672015-03-29T19:09:00.001-04:002015-03-29T19:09:10.770-04:00Tomorrow...I'm getting antsy. I spent my birthday weekend splurging: cupcakes, nachos, candy, Chinese, chicken wings... The list goes on. I'm a little overloaded on the various splurges that I indulged in. But... It was my birthday! <div><br></div><div>Speaking of my birthday, look what I got!</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-kthzZKgoJs8/VRiGE53QnZI/AAAAAAAAAuk/9B1g_t-Mpf0/s640/blogger-image--1647764235.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-kthzZKgoJs8/VRiGE53QnZI/AAAAAAAAAuk/9B1g_t-Mpf0/s640/blogger-image--1647764235.jpg"></a></div><br></div><div>It's my new Fitbit charge. Considering my job is extremely sedentary, I love that it will remind me to move when I've been sitting too long, even if it is just a walk around the building every hour.</div><div><br></div><div>Tomorrow morning is my first weigh in. Tomorrow is my day to start tram eating myself well. Tomorrow is the day where I start caring about myself. I'm so ready for this.</div>kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-84075790531564499192015-03-26T12:31:00.003-04:002015-03-26T12:31:35.257-04:00A clandestine operationIt's hard to believe that this journey started seven years ago. That was when my first post on this blog was published, back in January 2008. It's now the end of March 2015 and I'm back where I started. I actually don't think I'm as heavy as I was back in grad school, although, as I've mentioned before, I never stepped on a scale in grad school so I couldn't tell you. What I COULD tell you is that I've been stuck fluctuating between the same ten pounds since August 2013, and I'm sick of it. <br />
<br />
I'm sick of being at this weight.<br />
<br />
I'm sick of having to take blood pressure medicine.<br />
<br />
I'm sick of having to buy "plus sized" clothes.<br />
<br />I'm sick of not feeling comfortable unless I'm wearing spanx in public. <br />
<br />
I'm sick of thinking about going to the pool with my son this summer. He adores the water, and I hate my thighs.<br />
<br />
I'm sick of hearing that I am having bad luck getting pregnant because I'm obese. <br />
<br />
I'm just sick of it.<br />
<br />
I spoke to a life coach today. That's something that I never would have done eight years ago, but I'm doing a productivity project at work, and part of it is having access to life coaches. I told him about my life: how I have a great husband and son, how I am doing well at work... but how I feel guilty about taking any time for myself. And when I say taking time for myself, I don't mean getting weekly pedicures. I mean, taking 30 minutes to go work out. Back in 2008, I would go to a 45 minute spin class without even considering the effects. Now? 30 minutes seems to be a deal breaker in my mind.<br />
<br />So, my life coach told me to create a mission. Tomorrow, I am celebrating my 35th birthday. I don't want to spend another year at this weight. I want to be healthy. I don't want to be self-conscious. I don't want to feel like a blob when I'm sitting on a couch. I want to be able to shop at Target, for Pete's sake! So, starting Monday, I will be making better choices about my food. I will be making conscious efforts to be more active once I am cleared for exercise on Wednesday (I had an appendectomy a few weeks ago). All in all, I am looking to make my life better. So, stay tuned. kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-35817509508367536412013-02-17T15:59:00.001-05:002013-02-17T15:59:29.191-05:00Oops...It's been a while since I posted. But I'll get to that in a bit.<br />
<br />
My first week back, I gained two pounds. Yup, you heard right. Drove me insane! I worked out, ate right and gained two pounds. Ughhhhhhh. I was beyond disappointed. Then, I decided to hit the gym hard the next week, but both Baby and I got the flu. Awful! So I haven't been at the gym for a week now. We're both feeling better now, so back to the drawing board!kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-69268111365478718482013-02-03T15:55:00.000-05:002013-02-03T16:23:50.928-05:00Gearing up for the big...Well, definitely not the big game, as I don't care for either of the teams in the Superbowl. I'm a huge Eagles fan, and Mr. Kiki is a huge Steelers fan... it just wasn't in the cards for a PA Superbowl.
Anyway, I'm ready for the big C. The big CHANGE. On Friday, I met with my trainer and on Saturday, I met with my nutritionist. I feel like I'm really equipped to start this new journey in my life. What was great that both of them were really approachable and realistic about goals. For instance, my trainer wants me to get 2-3 hours of cardio in a week until we meet again in 10 days. I can TOTALLY do that. My nutritionist wants me to stick to a calorie goal as well as add more protein to every meal and stay away from overloading on carbs. I can TOTALLY do that.
I told them about my previous weight loss journey, and they both asked me what I thought made that work. I realized that I was single so I had a lot of control over things: namely, what I ate and when I exercised. I used to go on 8 mile hikes with my friends that lasted for hours without worrying about anyone at home. I can't really do that anymore. I have Mr. Kiki and Baby K. I want to spend as much time with them as I can. Both my trainer and nutritionist recognize that this is an important goal for me, along with getting healthy.
I'm a little too excited for this new part of my journey. It might be the first time that I'm looking at making these lifestyle changes with a "YES!" attitude rather than a "Oh, man... I have to do WHAT?" attitude. I'm hoping that makes me more successful as well.kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-58298977806631368482013-01-20T15:35:00.001-05:002013-01-20T15:35:57.545-05:00What's your number?So, a few things have changed since the last time I blogged.
I got engaged.
I got married.
I had a baby.
Throughout all those things, I gain back all the weight I had lost and more. I know, I know, I was pregnant, but I got pregnant at a high weight. I remember the day that I went in for my induction, the nurse asked me to step on the scale. OMG. The highest number I ever saw. Easily. The worst part about it is that a week later, when I finally had the guts to step on the scale, I had only lost 10 pounds. I had an almost 9 pound baby, and had only lost 10 pounds.
That was five months ago. As part of getting my life back in gear after a four month maternity leave, I decided to take advantage of a "once in a lifetime" benefit offered by my health insurance. For a $20 copay, I have access to a personal trainer, a nutritionist, a gym membership, and behavioral counseling to help me kick my butt back into gear. In order to qualify for this program, not only did I have to be obese (duh) but I also had to fill out a lot of behavioral questionnaires along with getting my PCP's permission and some bloodwork done.
One of the questions I was asked was how many diets I had been on during my adult life. Hmm... I consider my adult life to start from the moment I graduated college 12 years ago. How many diets had I been on since then? Well, there was a failed attempt at Weight Watchers, a short lived attempt at Slimfast (seriously, wtf was I thinking?), my short-lived tolerance for a Six Week Body Makeover, my "divorce diet" (which was my only success, since I threw myself into eating right and exercising my heart out), my bad attempt at using Alli (seriously, if I wanted to poo myself, I didn't need assistance!), and my numerous attempts at South Beach. That's six major "diets" in twelve years. In twelve years, I had gained 60 pounds, lost 80, and gained 110 (that includes growing a fetus, but you know...)
What the heck was I doing? What road was I going down? I do know that my current weight does not make me happy. I don't like going clothes shopping. I don't enjoy that I have a hard time getting up after playing with Baby K on the floor. I don't like my flabby gut that hangs over my c-section scar. Something has to change.
Over the past few weeks, I've been counting calories. On Wednesday, I'm meeting with the nutritionist for the first time, and on Friday morning, I have an appointment for my first "assessment" with my personal trainer. I'm glad you're joining me on this journey again. And this time will be the last time, because I realize that I can't keep doing this to myself.kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-62219892194398311802011-10-20T08:15:00.002-04:002011-10-20T08:21:04.078-04:00It took some convincing...In my last post, I told the blogosphere that I was going to get up early and exercise before I went to the office. Well, it might have taken almost two weeks of some convincing, but I finally did it. There's just no way for me to work out after I get home from the office. I work hard, I'm tired, and I'm just unmotivated. If I did it in the morning... then I wouldn't be awake enough to really complain about it :)<br /><br />I came up with the brilliant idea to try couch to 5K again. I'm about 30 pounds heavier than the last time I tried it out, so I was prepared for failure. Surprisingly enough (to me), I was awesome. The first week is 20 minute of 60 seconds running and 90 seconds of walking. I really didn't think that I would be able to make it through 20 minutes, and I pictured myself gasping for air after the first 60 second run. (Obviously, I still haven't caught onto that positive thinking thing.) And yet... I surprised myself. I made it through the whole 20 minutes without getting a side cramp. Including the 5 minute warm up walk and the 5 minute cool down walk... I did 30 minutes of cardio today.<br /><br />HIGH FIVE!kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-15707068976101930932011-10-10T07:26:00.002-04:002011-10-10T07:42:04.381-04:00Cuando, cuando, cuandoOnce upon a time, getting up at 6AM to hit the gym was second nature. Okay, I won't really lie to you... it wasn't second nature, but a lot easier than it is now. Now, getting up at 7AM is a chore in itself. There's something nice about snuggling up next to your husband, especially on a chilly fall morning. It's like having your own personal heater. (And yes, people, I'm talking about snuggling, get your minds out of the gutter!) I usually head into the office by 9 and come home by 5:30 or 6. I make dinner (if it's Monday or Wednesday... Mr. Kiki makes dinner on T/R when I have an afternoon full of teaching). and then settle in for the night.<br /><br />Oh yes, I settle in for the night around 7PM. <br /><br />As much as I've been loathing Jillian Michaels lately (don't ask... she kinda irritates me on a talk show), there's a line in the 30 Day Shred that always sticks with me. Here's an <a href="http://chicklit1028.wordpress.com/2010/11/10/lethargy/">excerpt</a>: “People are so placated by groups that say, ‘Start by taking the stairs,” says Michaels. “What? That makes people think, ‘I’m so fragile, I can barely take the staircase.’” In fact, she says, the human body can withstand a lot—and increasing the intensity of your workout is one of the fastest ways to burn calories and lose weight. “The more we hear this false message of lethargy, the more we believe it,” she says. “As humans, we have evolved to the point where the sky is not the limit. Your capabilities are, in fact, limitless.” <br /><br />So... I don't want to get up before 7AM, but I want to be settled in by 7PM? Pretty unbelievable, right? I sound like a 70 year old versus a 31 year old. I've decided to commit myself to some evening workout time. There's nothing wrong with hitting the elliptical or the treadmill at 7:30PM, especially since I've been utilizing my complex's workout room. Or, if I didn't want to go there, I could easily pop in a video and do 30 minutes of cardio in the bedroom. These are all things that I *used* to do... but since I met my personal heater... er, Mr. Kiki... it's been more difficult to unlatch myself from the snuggliness that is our post-dinner routine. Let's see how successful I am with this approach.kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-29297465779708657042011-10-05T09:03:00.002-04:002011-10-05T09:12:30.859-04:00Red in the faceMonday was my first workout session in what seems like forever. I had a small procedure done in mid-September (all is fine, and I'm okay) and so I had to lay off the exercise for almost two and a half weeks. Funny, but in the workup for this procedure, my surgeon sent me a list of things to do BEFORE the surgery that would make afterward that much easier. Along with eating right and not taking anything that could thin my blood (fun, right?), he also suggested taking 30 minute walks to pump up my stamina. For someone who was having a hard time working out, walks were great. I got out in the sun. I enjoyed the rolling hills of the medical campus not too far from my home. Fresh air. Yum.<br /><br />Well, the past five days have been absolutely crappy weather-wise. It got cold on Friday, which turned into wet and VERY cold on Saturday and Sunday and Monday. On Monday afternoon, I wanted to wrap myself up in a blanket and watch Real Housewives of Anywhere, but instead, I dragged myself to the workout room in my complex. It's a small room with two treadmills, two ellipticals, a recumbent bike, and a nautilus machine, but it wasn't raining in there. I got myself on a treadmill and took off! The machines all face a one way mirror (the women in the complex's office can see you, but you're looking at your reflection) and I couldn't believe how red my face got. Has it been that long? Was it the awkwardness of the treadmill? Both?<br /><br />When my 30 minutes were up, I was a little disappointed with how far I had gotten distance-wise, but then I thought that it was an accomplishment getting to the gym rather than curling up with a blanket and Bravo. And my flushed face had a smile on it as I walked back to my apartment in the rain.kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-21795265831774870862011-10-03T07:57:00.003-04:002011-10-03T08:08:47.335-04:00Waking UpIt's been quite a while since I wrote on *any* blog, but especially this one. However, over the weekend, one of my favorite long-lost weight-loss bloggers turned up on my google reader, and I thought to myself... "wait, how many people are still subscribed to Taking Chances? I wonder if people are still listening, and wondering where I've been." The answer: 63. There are sixty three people subscribed to this blog. Unbelievable. You've been here all along. Where have I been?<br /><br />This summer was a bit of a trying time for me, emotionally and physically. I did a boot camp for six weeks that felt great, but after my wedding in mid-summer, I pretty much stopped going to the gym. The rest of the summer was an on and off of fitness. I love going out for walks (long challenging walks, with hills and hills and hills) but the weather isn't cooperating. I'm thinking about joining a gym again until the weather gets warm again. It doesn't mean I need to go every day, but on those days like today, where it's rainy and cold, heading to a warm gym with nice cardio equipment would be a great idea.<br /><br />Anyway, I'm back. I'm not going to act like I'm going to cannonball back in, but I am going to use this blog to help me learn some good habits once again.kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-67124692462910536552011-01-21T10:19:00.004-05:002011-01-21T10:35:33.668-05:00Weekly Weigh In: I left my motivation in San Francisco...Okay, channelling Tony Bennett... I left my motivation in Philly over the weekend. Last Friday, I didn't post my Weekly Weigh In, because we left very early to drive to Philly to visit my mom for her birthday. But I had a very successful week... losing close to three pounds!! Fast forward one week, lots of eating out, no exercise, and some stress eating, guess what? That weekly weigh in is gone. I've literally gained back the weight that I lost last week. So, I find myself back at the beginning.<div><br /></div><div>But according to Julie Andrews, isn't that a very good place to start? Well, maybe not on this health journey.</div><div><br /></div><div>I started to think about my lost motivation. Why do I want to lose weight?</div><div><br /></div><div>1) I want to get off my blood pressure meds.</div><div>2) I don't want to have a stroke at age 41, like my cousin did.</div><div>3) I want to be able to conceive without any problems, when the time is right.</div><div>4) I don't want a difficult pregnancy, nor do I want to be classified as high risk pregnancy.</div><div>5) I want to be able to fit in clothes that I can buy in the "misses" section, not the "plus" section.</div><div>6) I want to be strong again.</div><div>7) I don't want to get winded walking up the stairs at my office (four flights) or walking from my parking lot to the office (all uphill).</div><div>8) I want to look awesome in a bathing suit on my honeymoon.</div><div>9) I want to feel sexy in my wedding dress.</div><div>10) I don't want to have to wear spanx to suck in my belly. </div><div><br /></div><div>Most of my reasons are health related, but there are some vanity ones in there as well. I want to be healthy, but I also want to be happy, and yes, my self-esteem has taken a hit lately. I've been racking my brain lately as to what I can do to motivate myself. Somehow, waking up to do workout tapes has not been motivating. I think that I need to re-join a gym. I loved working out at the gym, using the weight machines, the rowing machine, etc. I felt strong then. And, thanks to my job, I have a new temporary six-month raise (yes, it's temporary, don't ask, I'll take what I can get) that I can justify using for this venture. So, here we go again. To me, starting over again and again is probably better than just giving up all together, right? And maybe, I'll get this thing going once again.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-12220647890184561192011-01-10T20:31:00.002-05:002011-01-10T20:50:36.128-05:00My Biggest FearI'm sitting here watching last week's episode of the Biggest Loser... and certain woman (who's name I don't remember, I know, awful) moved me to tears with her story. She's had multiple miscarriages due to her weight. While I have never been pregnant and am currently not trying to get pregnant, I know how much of a factor weight is on a healthy pregnancy, and at three months out from my 31st birthday, I'd be lying if I didn't say that this was something on my mind. And this woman... she embodies everything I'm afraid of. *shudder*<br /><br />The next step on my weight loss journey is that I joined Weight Watchers online today. All I can say is WTF? I've had success on the old school WW plan, so I thought I'd try this new plan out. I used the calculator around lunch time today and <b>the calculations don't use calories anymore<i>. </i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;">Um, what? What do you mean points are based off of carbs, fat, fiber, and protein? Where are the calories?!? Why aren't they important? I have to admit that I was also a bit turned off by the fact that most of my fallback foods have higher point values now. Ugh. I was ready to call it quits by 6PM. But then I realized, crap, I just bought myself three months worth of this, I might as well ride it out. I also made a commitment to a friend who bought herself three months of the program as well to work along side with her. </span></b><div><br /></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"></span></b>Damn... commitment is hard... but worth it :)<br /><br /></div>kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-29237676601145646552011-01-09T17:08:00.005-05:002011-01-09T17:19:03.711-05:00And now for my disappearing act!Nah, I didn't give up on blogging that easily. I was in New Orleans for a conference! New Orleans is a very special place for me, mainly because it's where Andy asked me to marry him last year. He joined me on this trip, and we made the most of it, even though I had a full day of work that needed to be done before I could enjoy myself. We did a ton of walking, especially around the French Quarter:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/TSoygxxo0dI/AAAAAAAAAXQ/QpgRFO22rEE/s1600/IMG_1490.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/TSoygxxo0dI/AAAAAAAAAXQ/QpgRFO22rEE/s320/IMG_1490.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560312228641034706" /></a><br /><br />I love New Orleans because it is such a walkable city. It's pretty flat, and the sidewalks are wide, and there is minimal public transportation. You *have* to walk. According to Google Maps, it was a 1.4 mile walk one way from our hotel to the French Quarter. That's almost three miles roundtrip! We also walked to dinners and along the Mississippi. It was a great walking trip. However, if you've been to New Orleans, you know there is one place that you *have* to go. It's the place that serves these wonderful things:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/TSoz3ti8XaI/AAAAAAAAAXY/0KF_GavRGF4/s1600/IMG_0630.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/TSoz3ti8XaI/AAAAAAAAAXY/0KF_GavRGF4/s320/IMG_0630.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560313722154278306" /></a><br /><br />Mmm, beignets. Yes, they are deep fried dough covered in powdered sugar, but they are quintessential French Market cuisine. And yes, while I've been indulging myself a bit too often, you can't go on a trip to New Orleans and not have these. That being said, I'll be back on track tomorrow morning: food, exercise, and accountability.kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-16977762329692107162011-01-04T08:26:00.003-05:002011-01-04T08:37:14.566-05:00My life in stickiesI'm a huge Post-It note (in my vernacular, "stickies") fan. I make a to-do list every day on a sticky note, tuck it inside my planner, and try to follow it religiously. However, yesterday, I read <a href="http://workawesome.com/productivity/sticky-note/">this article</a> about how you should only have six "to-dos" on your sticky note in order to not feel overwhelmed and actually accomplish things throughout your day. So, I thought I'd try it out:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/TSMg5h349lI/AAAAAAAAAXE/JLC7UyxBA_I/s1600/checklist.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/TSMg5h349lI/AAAAAAAAAXE/JLC7UyxBA_I/s320/checklist.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5558322537822746194" /></a><br /><br />Did you catch #6? Yes, that's right. In the middle of my very busy day, I thought that exercise was important enough to be on my narrow list of things to do. And I'm proud of myself. I came home from the office a bit exhausted, and almost got sucked into watching a "Tabitha's Salon Takeover" marathon on Bravo (anything on that channel is extremely addictive to me). But I finally put my workout clothes on and did 30 minutes of the <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Biggest-Loser-Workout-Boot-Camp/dp/B001GP5TLS/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1294148092&sr=8-1">Biggest Loser's Boot Camp</a>. I owned this since October, but haven't tried it once. Lots of squats and lunges and weights along with some cardio.... kinda reminds me of Jillian's 30 Day Shred, but taken down a notch. I liked it. It was just what I needed.<br /><br />Did you include exercise on your sticky (whether real or mental) today?kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-22262669745601686952011-01-01T22:36:00.003-05:002011-01-01T22:48:41.429-05:00Putting things into perspectiveI'd like to blame my future mother-in-law. Over the summer, she insisted on taking a picture of Andy and myself, so she could post it on Facebook for all her friends to see. Um, no. Not one picture looked right, so although much to her disappointment, she erased them. I'd also like to blame my future sister-in-law. She won a camera at her company's Christmas party, and while she's been photo attacking everyone, the photos she posted on her Picasa made me pause and say, Oh my. <br /><br />Have I really gotten that big?<br /><br />I've realized over the past few months that I really need to put things in perspective. After all, I gained an easy 20 pounds from October 2009 until January 2010 (stop exercise and add Christmas cookies... yeah, it's that easy). Mix in a research sabbatical that meant that I could sit around and wear nothing but sweatpants and pajamas all day, stir in some back to school shopping (in a larger size), and poof... not surprisingly, I'm almost 40 pounds heavier than I was 15 months ago.<br /><br />If that isn't scary enough, I looked at it a bit differently while I was updating this blog. I'm about 30 pound lighter than my heaviest weight. When did the scales tip in that direction? Sure, when I was just 20 pounds heavier than my lowest weight, that was an "easy" number to return to. But now... I'm in that "oh shit" zone. How did I get back here? When did the scales tip over 200 and I was okay with that? Why was I able to cancel my gym membership, completely unfazed?<br /><br />I know what everyone is thinking: oh no, here comes *another* new year's resolution. But honestly, I think I've outgrown that. I'm going to turn 31 in a few months, I'm getting married a few months after that, and the next step is to start a family. There is no way that is going to happen if I'm not healthy. Trust me, it isn't all about looking great in pictures (but damn how they show us what we've been denying), it's about getting back to a healthy weight and being happy.<br /><br />Welcome back to my journey.kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-50744786585969174022009-05-29T19:58:00.000-04:002009-05-29T19:59:03.330-04:00I've MovedNew blog, new attitude... come visit me over at http://hardcorekiki.wordpress.com/kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-70368466793245848092009-05-12T14:03:00.003-04:002009-05-12T15:07:39.953-04:00Let's Start at the Very BeginningI decided that this summer is the time for me to get back on track with my weight loss and fitness. Last summer, I had a lot of personal stress on myself, and luckily, this summer, it's all gone. Instead, this is going to be the summer of me. My job is to be my most fabulous self. That's what everyone's goal should be, since everything else just falls into place from there. <br /><br />Anyway, like one of my favorite songs from the Sound of Music, I decided to start from the very beginning, because it's a very good place to start! I figured I would get myself out on the rail trail and run a mile. After I ran the mile, I decided to tack another half mile onto it, and I have to admit that at the end of the 1.5 miles, I was tired. It's been a while since I've run that far. But I did it... 1.5 miles! I rock! I came home and did some weight work, and I feel pretty darn good. <br /><br />What have YOU done today to make you feel proud?kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-15982958979260863352009-05-11T09:42:00.003-04:002009-05-11T09:46:53.925-04:00Stepping outside of my box<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/SggrYzXHWFI/AAAAAAAAAOM/WGcKIT7bsFE/s1600-h/firstclimb2.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/SggrYzXHWFI/AAAAAAAAAOM/WGcKIT7bsFE/s320/firstclimb2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5334561463724365906" /></a><br /><br />After not doing much of anything over the past week (I hit a spinning class on Monday and then took the rest of the week off because of my work load), I decided to tag along with a group of friends who were going rock climbing on Sunday morning. I've never been rock climbing, and maybe I should have been grading... but instead, I decided to go for my very first rock climb. My first time up, I think I got about three feet off the ground before I was begging Dave(our belayer) to let me back down. After some time, and with a little encouragement, I decided to try it again. I got about half way up the rock, which was a lot further than I thought I would every get, and I got stuck in this really difficult part that everyone got stuck at. My hands are a lot more raw than I ever expected them to be, and I have a really nice bruise on my knee (which is huge... in the pictures, it just looks like some scratches. No way... it's about the size of a half dollar and nice and red). But I'm hooked. I think I'm buying a pair of climbing shoes this week in prep for our climb on Friday morning... it is summer for us in the academic world... try not to be jealous :)<br /><br />Check out how red my hands are in this picture. This is pain and love:<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/SggsHAEXF4I/AAAAAAAAAOU/LGx0TF8ktMM/s1600-h/firstclimb3.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_fAjhEvbW-gU/SggsHAEXF4I/AAAAAAAAAOU/LGx0TF8ktMM/s320/firstclimb3.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5334562257409349506" /></a><br>kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-50243740407760233002009-05-04T08:42:00.002-04:002009-05-04T08:50:26.889-04:00Where Have I Been?Hi guys. Sorry that I haven't been updating the blog lately. My life has been crazy busy lately. First off, work is insane. Research wise, I have a ton of balls up in the air, and I'm trying not to drop any of them. I've done that before, and wasted a good year of research work. My classes are almost over, so while the grading has kind of calmed down at this point in the week, I'll be spending all weekend grading final exams. Secondly, I've been really busy personally. Lots of six mile walks with friends outdoors, giving myself some well deserved Kiki time now that spring has sprung. I'd like to get back to blogging regularly, but I don't know when. You'll just have to keep checking for updates.<br /><br />My biggest issue right now is stress eating. Between my research and my grading, I've been nibbling on candy here and there. Luckily for me, I'm still losing, not gaining, but obviously, I'm not losing as fast as I probably could if I was not eating candy throughout the day. Also, at this time of the year, I have no motivation to cook, so I've been eating lots of Subway (seriously, Jared, how did you do this for extended periods of time?), sandwiches and frozen meals (yes, I know, sodium, but it's going to have to do for now). <br /><br />So, really, I am here, putting in the time at the gym, but at the same time... I'm so busy that I can't really update my blog regularly. Thanks for wondering where I've been, all the same :)kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-82144299472945987592009-04-27T20:40:00.000-04:002009-04-27T20:41:16.111-04:00Confessions Part III went to spinning class today (it rocked) and while I was sweating it out, I noticed what a nice waist I'm whittling. Woo!!!kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-88824117831721131032009-04-27T13:43:00.001-04:002009-04-27T13:44:55.028-04:00ConfessionI hate anything Miley Cyrus or Hannah Montana related. But I *love* when "See You Again" by Miley Cyrus pops up on my Ipod. I'm such a nerd.kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-3857256307248306522009-04-24T08:55:00.002-04:002009-04-24T08:59:51.400-04:00Weekly Weigh In: Fitting Things InThis week has been all about my work. And I've gotten a lot done. But as the end of the semester nears, I'm starting to find myself in a familiar place: guilt ridden at going to the gym or for spending time outside rather than working. This week, I've gone for runs, done the elliptical and enjoyed some long (5 mile) walks outside, while still accomplishing all I need to get done at work. And it feels great to take some time for myself and to see the scale moving, but also, to see my body changing.kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-11222221311505340662009-04-20T21:25:00.002-04:002009-04-20T21:28:36.171-04:00Change of PlansThis weekend ended up a little differently than I had planned. Originally, I thought that I would squeeze in another run on Friday and Saturday, but that didn't happen. On Friday, I went for a six mile hike with some friends on the rail trail in town. It was a gorgeous afternoon, and being Friday, it was nice to be able to vent to each other about our lives. Saturday found me at the local arboretum for a 75 minute hike. It was a lot warmer than I expected, but wandering through the arboretum and then down to the rail trail made me a happy camper. My blisters told me to take Sunday off, but I was back to running... in the rain, no less!... this evening. I was challenged by a Facebook friend (who just happens to be my best friend from Pre-K, that's going way back) to run a 5K with her over Memorial Day weekend. I'm in it, maybe not to win it, but to complete it would be a win in itself!kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-46846818543226187402009-04-17T10:10:00.002-04:002009-04-17T10:16:52.527-04:00Weekly Weigh In: I'm Still a Rock StarOne of my favorite songs of the past year or so is Pink's "So What?" It reminds me that stuff happens, but at the same time, we continue to be the awesome person that is way down deep inside all of us. My first So What? of the week is that I gained 0.4 pounds this week. Where did it come from? Well, I went home to see my family for the first time since Christmas break. I ate everything that my family put in front of me, within reason, of course. A few people at Easter dinner noticed that I didn't take a ton of food the first time around the buffet spread and that I didn't go back for seconds. At dessert time, my cousin and I split some of our desserts. My second So What? is that lent was FINALLY over and I did indulge in some Cadbury mini eggs and Dove truffle eggs. My tummy is still recovering from the reintroduction of that kind of dairy in my diet, but at the same time, I was so hungry for it. So, that half pound? So what? It'll be gone next week, and I have some great memories with my family.<br /><br />The last So What? I want to share with you is something that I read in Us Weekly (I know, it's my thing, leave it alone). It was about celebrities with cellulite and how they're putting it out there and saying So What that I have cellulite? I love it! Kim Kardashian, Sophia Bush, Kate Winslet, even Reese Witherspoon! How awesome is that? As someone who has cellulite as well, I'm glad that celebs are coming forward and saying that pretty much everyone has cellulite. It's true. Get over it.<br /><br />I went for a run yesterday afternoon (2 miles) and am going for another one today and tomorrow. Gotta enjoy the sun while it's here! Hope you have a great weekend!kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-19952409377746989862009-04-14T10:19:00.002-04:002009-04-14T10:21:30.493-04:00Finding My MotivationI was away for a long weekend... seriously, my weekend started on Wednesday night and I didn't get back in town until yesterday afternoon. During that time I did not work out once, which makes my gain really no big surprise. However, it's back in the saddle today. I did the 30 Day Shred to get back in the swing of things since I didn't have the motivation to get out of bed and get to the gym. However, I'll be there tomorrow morning unless it's really nice and I can go for a run :)kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7743636632765666203.post-6929082388929498412009-04-06T09:14:00.002-04:002009-04-06T09:17:19.619-04:00Fitness WeekendAfter the past few weeks of being a bit lazy on the fitness side of things, I decided to kick it into high gear. Friday, I did a good 45 minutes on the elliptical. Saturday, again, another 30 minutes on the elliptical and Level 3 of the 30 Day Shred (seriously, not as ass kicking as Level 2... which made it that much better!). Sunday was a mile run with a three mile hike. It's funny when you think about fitness, we do it because we want to look better, and therefore, feel better about ourselves. Honestly, I've been working out consistently for about a week now, and even though I might not *look* any different, I feel much more confident about my body and what I'm capable of doing. I think those of us who have been slacking, er, too busy, to work out need a reminder like that every once in a while :)kikimonsterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03469465413114384357noreply@blogger.com6